Saturday, September 11, 2010

Accept Loss Forever

My friend has this quote tattooed to her leg. It has always been one of my favorite tattoos I have ever seen, and I am not even really into Kerouac.

I have lost a lot, lately. But luckily bad things come in threes, and the third thing just happened, so I am free of it, at least.

New, and good things abound.

Spenser and I drove to Milwaukee on a whim. Last night we watched Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3, and baked Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies. So that has been bringing me out of my funk. He is defensive of me, which is nice.

Also, old friends are good to see again.

It's sad to me, though, how quickly some people will burn bridges. Alas, alack. I'm not embarrassed, or ashamed to admit that I feel a little betrayed by people that painted themselves as one thing, but are obviously, and ferociously not. I see my own faults, and mistakes, I admit them, I'd admit them before being confronted with them, but to be shunned by people who I have done so much for, is really unfortunate. To be cast out is not something I would wish on anyone, especially to be cast out by people you trusted.

Eh. What's done is done is done.

I'm done thinking about it.

The cookies are perfect. My boyfriend is a good person. He can be irritating, and we may argue, but he would never be malicious toward me, or toward anyone. He is respectful, and caring, and I am grateful. I like being soft, I would choose every time to be soft, and compassionate, even if it means I am socially awkward.

It took some turmoil and loss to me to see myself and like what I saw.

I like this a ton and a bunch.

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