Jay Torrence has a new play in Too Much Light that took my breath away. The spoken part was gorgeous, and heartbreaking, and then when he tips the ladder and falls, there is just a stillness and quiet in the theater, and my hear is broken in half. It is a beautiful image.
The funny plays were funny, too, but Jay's play was like the quiet sympathy you have for a friend who just got dumped by a long term S.O. It's surprise and fear.
I have been talking to John's sister, Jeannie a lot, lately. I like her so much. I am excited to go with her and Levi and John to see the Pirate exhibit at the Museum of Science and Industry.
John comes back from LA on Monday, after having Easter with Dino. That should be... interesting at worst, exciting and terrifying at best.
My anchor is having trouble again.
I just typed out "Play." for no reason.
odd..
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Saturday?
It was amazing. It was truly, beyond great. I had a good day at work, it was busy, and I got lousy tips, but I had a blast. I then got to go to Chipotle, with John, and we got mm mm tacos. I have dreams about them.
I left my bike my the Chipotle, and now the weather is HORRIFIC. All the worst parts of rain and snow, cold slush falling from the sky. I need to pick it up tomorrow. I hope she's still there. I don't think anyone would steal a bike like Sheila.
In any case, Too Much Light last night was pretty good, not the best I'd seen. I still love Megan's suitcase play, and it's great to see Mary again.
Today, the weather turned into bullshit, and I almost didn't make it to work on time. John leaves for California on Wednesday, and I am working like a madman all week. My feets hurt already.
Now I am ready to curl up and sleep with my kitty babies.
First, some crosswords.
Good show.
I left my bike my the Chipotle, and now the weather is HORRIFIC. All the worst parts of rain and snow, cold slush falling from the sky. I need to pick it up tomorrow. I hope she's still there. I don't think anyone would steal a bike like Sheila.
In any case, Too Much Light last night was pretty good, not the best I'd seen. I still love Megan's suitcase play, and it's great to see Mary again.
Today, the weather turned into bullshit, and I almost didn't make it to work on time. John leaves for California on Wednesday, and I am working like a madman all week. My feets hurt already.
Now I am ready to curl up and sleep with my kitty babies.
First, some crosswords.
Good show.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Bad Day
April 3rd, from the very start, was not good.
1. Cracked, more like, shattered the glass screen on the iPhone.
2. My checks that I deposited have not yet completely cleared.
3. Accidentally slept way, way later than I would have liked.
4. When I sent in my registration for Circus School, the form I sent, although I sent the filled out PDF, arrived blank, and so I had to send it again.
5. Miscellaneous Fees in my bank account?!
6. Not doing anything on a Friday night.
I feel like I need a good cry.
Today was ridiculous. John is good at cheering me up. I really wanted to see a movie tonight.
Lame. I want Chipotle tacos. Right now.
1. Cracked, more like, shattered the glass screen on the iPhone.
2. My checks that I deposited have not yet completely cleared.
3. Accidentally slept way, way later than I would have liked.
4. When I sent in my registration for Circus School, the form I sent, although I sent the filled out PDF, arrived blank, and so I had to send it again.
5. Miscellaneous Fees in my bank account?!
6. Not doing anything on a Friday night.
I feel like I need a good cry.
Today was ridiculous. John is good at cheering me up. I really wanted to see a movie tonight.
Lame. I want Chipotle tacos. Right now.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
For Serious, Guys.
There is something REALLY wrong, really, very wrong, with me. The trouble, you see, is that there are new bus ads, the the sides of the buses, that are all LED lit, and very VERY bright. The trouble begins, for me, personally, when the bus is driving by, and a very bright blue light shines in through the store's front window, and my first instinct?
Duck!
Why?
Aliens.
Not even a joke. There were customers in the store, and all of a sudden there's a blue light, and I am down on my knees behind the counter, thinking, "Holy shit! Aliens! I am going to die!" I began to think that I might have seen things, so I peek over the counter and see Mary Poppins, complete with umbrella and carpet bag, on the side of the bus, in the light. It was beyond embarrassing.
In other news, either here, or on YouTube, or on my other blog, (which is more or less also about my days, only... from the perspective of me after I experienced something that might have killed me. It's an odd little writing project I am doing. So, no matter what I write, I will always put a link to it here. Cool? Yes? Maybe?
A lot of the people I watch on youtube are doing the BEDA/VEDA business, and while I assumed they'd be Vlogging, I was inspired by Haley G. Hoover to do write. I love to write, and sometimes I feel like I only ought to write is I have something to say, so maybe I will find I have more to say than I thought. Cool?
Cool.
Alright.
Duck!
Why?
Aliens.
Not even a joke. There were customers in the store, and all of a sudden there's a blue light, and I am down on my knees behind the counter, thinking, "Holy shit! Aliens! I am going to die!" I began to think that I might have seen things, so I peek over the counter and see Mary Poppins, complete with umbrella and carpet bag, on the side of the bus, in the light. It was beyond embarrassing.
In other news, either here, or on YouTube, or on my other blog, (which is more or less also about my days, only... from the perspective of me after I experienced something that might have killed me. It's an odd little writing project I am doing. So, no matter what I write, I will always put a link to it here. Cool? Yes? Maybe?
A lot of the people I watch on youtube are doing the BEDA/VEDA business, and while I assumed they'd be Vlogging, I was inspired by Haley G. Hoover to do write. I love to write, and sometimes I feel like I only ought to write is I have something to say, so maybe I will find I have more to say than I thought. Cool?
Cool.
Alright.
Hey!
Let's make some sense around here!
I gotta go to work!
So, after work!
Let's do BEDA!
Yes!
I got this.
I gotta go to work!
So, after work!
Let's do BEDA!
Yes!
I got this.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
The Truth
The truth is, that when I think about her, and her obsession, I have nothing, absolutely nothing but sympathy, because I find myself thinking that one day, I will need the things she needs.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Saturday, November 22, 2008
The Trouble
My life is not nearly as dramatic and sad as it seems when I write here. I write here when the mood strikes and oftentimes, lately, it appears, that is not a good mood. I don't like being ignored. I don't like feeling invisible. He's making me feel invisible. I am beginning to wonder if perhaps I am invisible. Kevin didn't see me last night either. Maybe I am just fading away in to oblivion and obscurity and some other o word that I don't know and never will unless I spent a little less time trying to get noticed and a little more time looking at a webster's dictionary.
The truth about the fact is, no matter what I tell almost anyone else, in the end, I will always choose John. I am still figuring out how to break this to you. I am still figuring out how you will take it. Because I like you. I think you are pretty great. Really. You are sweet.
But John has my heart, quite wholy and competely, as much as it kills me. He took without even trying, and perhaps that is wherein the trouble is.
Isn't it awful?
The truth about the fact is, no matter what I tell almost anyone else, in the end, I will always choose John. I am still figuring out how to break this to you. I am still figuring out how you will take it. Because I like you. I think you are pretty great. Really. You are sweet.
But John has my heart, quite wholy and competely, as much as it kills me. He took without even trying, and perhaps that is wherein the trouble is.
Isn't it awful?
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Call It Off
This song reminds me of you, and how I feel about you, and how I feel about the way I feel about you.
It makes my stomach heavy.
Not as heavy as when I listen to your songs about her,
but heavy, and sick.
I won't regret saying this,
this thing,
that I'm saying.
Is it better than keeping my mouth shut?
That goes without saying.
Yes.
I'm glad I have had the courage to say things that should be said. I am happy with the direction my life is moving. Perhaps though it is a lack of direction?
I don't know what I want to do.
I want to fill my life with chairs and theater and simple, beautiful music, with books and photo strips of you and me. We look good in those photos, even in the pictures that aren't that good, of either of us. We look good.
I wish there was a mathematical formula, that I could figure out, that would make it all okay for you. So you wouldn't care about the difference, between you and me, and the big difference, that I am not her.
I think about her every day. No matter how hard I try to avoid it. I think about her and the pieces of my broken heart fall at her feet and I ache.
My heart breaks for your broken heart.
Me>You>Her
That's how it goes. I will feel this way about you, and you will feel that way about her, and it will remain that way.
Call
Break
It
Off
Call
Break
My
Own
Heart
Maybe I woulda been something you'd be good at.
Maybe you woulda been something I'd be good at.
And when I think about this song, and how much I like it, and I listen to it, and think of everything wrong, I remember as the song ends, that it is just a song.
And My Number comes on, and it's good. My Number comes to the rescue.
It really IS a silly time to learn to swim when you start to drown.
<3twl
It makes my stomach heavy.
Not as heavy as when I listen to your songs about her,
but heavy, and sick.
I won't regret saying this,
this thing,
that I'm saying.
Is it better than keeping my mouth shut?
That goes without saying.
Yes.
I'm glad I have had the courage to say things that should be said. I am happy with the direction my life is moving. Perhaps though it is a lack of direction?
I don't know what I want to do.
I want to fill my life with chairs and theater and simple, beautiful music, with books and photo strips of you and me. We look good in those photos, even in the pictures that aren't that good, of either of us. We look good.
I wish there was a mathematical formula, that I could figure out, that would make it all okay for you. So you wouldn't care about the difference, between you and me, and the big difference, that I am not her.
I think about her every day. No matter how hard I try to avoid it. I think about her and the pieces of my broken heart fall at her feet and I ache.
My heart breaks for your broken heart.
Me>You>Her
That's how it goes. I will feel this way about you, and you will feel that way about her, and it will remain that way.
Call
Break
It
Off
Call
Break
My
Own
Heart
Maybe I woulda been something you'd be good at.
Maybe you woulda been something I'd be good at.
And when I think about this song, and how much I like it, and I listen to it, and think of everything wrong, I remember as the song ends, that it is just a song.
And My Number comes on, and it's good. My Number comes to the rescue.
It really IS a silly time to learn to swim when you start to drown.
<3twl
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